Men: traditional gender roles won’t get you what you want

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• How men’s beliefs are changing the fertility conversation
• Domestic labor, partner quality and the decision to become a parent
• Gaps in research: men’s voices remain undercounted
• Rethinking masculinity to support relationships and parenthood
• Policy lessons: what works in practice
• Where research and policy could focus next

Public worry about plunging birthrates has mostly focused on women. But men’s beliefs about gender, caregiving, and partnership are shaping family choices too. Ignoring those views leaves a blind spot in policy and research — and may help explain why efforts to reverse fertility declines have had mixed results.

How men’s beliefs are changing the fertility conversation

Polling shows men often view falling birthrates as a serious problem. Many also express a preference for older gender norms.

Recent surveys found nearly six in 10 men favor a return to traditional roles, compared with roughly four in 10 women. Among Republican men, that share rises to about 87 percent.

Those attitudes are moving beyond talk and into politics. Some conservative commentators have suggested rolling back advances in women’s rights. Mainstream outlets have even debated whether greater female participation has reshaped workplaces and relationships.

Domestic labor, partner quality and the decision to become a parent

The simple claim that more gender equality automatically yields more births is incomplete.

• Where men and women share housework fairly, couples report better outcomes.
• Women with financial independence are more likely to wait for supportive partners.
• Simply telling women to leave the workforce does not reliably increase fertility.

Evidence shows that in places where women bear most domestic burdens and face workplace penalties for motherhood, fertility collapsed. South Korea’s rate fell to about 0.75 children per woman in 2024. Japan dropped to roughly 1.15. Southern European nations like Italy, Spain, and Greece sit near 1.1–1.3.

A 2025 study covering over 40 European countries found a clear pattern: when men expect women to shoulder unpaid home labor while women want equality, both fertility and female employment dip. Where attitudes converge, both measures improve.

Still, the relationship is nuanced. Men today do more childcare than past generations, yet fertility continues to fall in many places. What matters may be perceived fairness, not just hours logged. Women report lower willingness to have children when they feel household labor is unfairly distributed.

Gaps in research: men’s voices remain undercounted

Demographers and social scientists have collected abundant data about women’s choices. Far less is known about how men interpret caregiving and family roles.

Many experts say the silence is not accidental. Studying men and masculinity has been treated as politically fraught. That has left a major blind spot in our understanding of family formation.

Without better data on men’s attitudes, explanations for fertility trends remain incomplete. Researchers argue we need more surveys that ask men about expectations, identity, and the division of labor.

Rethinking masculinity to support relationships and parenthood

The debate over masculinity is polarized. Some critics want to abandon traditional markers of manhood. Others propose a positive, relational model that prizes caregiving and emotional availability.

Advocates for a redesigned masculinity say it can offer men a clear, meaningful role without restoring old hierarchies. For some men, status and purpose come from being needed by family or community.

Daniel Cox of the Survey Center on Family Life suggests a concept of “relational masculinity” that ties meaning to protecting and providing in ways compatible with shared responsibilities.

Research on well-being supports this. In a study of over 3,000 Americans, people who felt needed by family or community reported higher life satisfaction.

Giving men socially acceptable routes to connection and purpose may reduce resistance to caregiving. That, in turn, can make partnerships more attractive and stable.

• Name and reduce harmful pressures around dominance and emotional stoicism.
• Broaden the cultural image of what a “good man” can be.
• Reward caregiving and relational involvement in public messaging and policy.

Policy lessons: what works in practice

Some countries offer practical examples of how policy and culture intersect.

• Nordic nations restructured parental leave, invested in childcare, and normalized flexible work.
• Fathers who use paid leave in Norway, Sweden, and Iceland are more likely to see partners welcome a second child.
• Those countries’ fertility rates cluster around 1.4–1.6 — short of replacement, but higher than many peers.
• France shows that closer alignment of men’s and women’s expectations about household sharing correlates with stronger family formation.

In contrast, where norms still assign most unpaid labor to women, fertility and female employment lag. In the United States, roughly 20 percent of parents describe their partnership as genuinely egalitarian. That figure points to a growing, but limited, shift.

Where research and policy could focus next

To make progress, scholars and policymakers must treat men’s attitudes as part of the problem — and part of the solution.

• Expand surveys and qualitative studies that center men’s experiences and beliefs.
• Design parental leave and workplace policies that encourage both parents to participate.
• Support cultural efforts that redefine strength to include caregiving and emotional work.

Only by understanding how identity, policy, and day-to-day routines intersect can societies hope to shape family outcomes in ways that respect people’s needs and choices.